How not to keep your house tidy: A Guide

Is this the lounge or Toys R Us?

Is this the lounge or Toys R Us?

Be prepared as I invite you to be judgy mummy. I am about to confess.

I have a cleaner. I know, I know – how middle class of me. To be fair though, it’s a bit of an essential (read life saver).

He (yes he- ooooh gender stereotypes) cleans for three hours every fortnight and he’s a God send. He is most definitely worth the money and I’ll tell you why. I. Can’t. Keep. My. House. Tidy. I just can’t. And I try –  I mean I really try.

I know that in order to stop the house from looking so messy I need to de-clutter. Remove some of the ever expanding piles of stuff that seems to frequent my abode; it just keeps piling up though and I never have the time to sit and sort through it. Like ever.

When I was pregnant I did the typical nesting thing. I sorted out the spare room that became the nursery where Pudding sleeps. I ordered and arranged the garage so you could actually move around and there were several car fulls of clutter and mess that made their way to the tip or charity shop. Well done me.

However, we seem to have arrived back at being cluttered. The lounge is now a children’s play room (obvs), the kitchen and hallway are really just a closet you walk through filled with: change bag, work bag, marking bag, shopping bag, cat scratching post, pushchair and random toys that precariously block the path and pose a health and safety risk. Don’t even get me started on the kitchen. It seems stuck between a laundry, post office sorting room and a pot wash.

And the bedroom just seems neglected and a place where cups of cold tea go to die. God this sounds awful  – please don’t picture squalor – it’s not that bad. It’s just lacking organisation.

So why am I not being more anal about keeping it tidy? Do I lack the OCD gene for a pristine home? Am I just a lazy lady of leisure?tidy 50s

No. Not at all. I just realised that, with being a mum, wife, primary caregiver to the cat and juggling a job, there wasn’t room to maintain a completely uncluttered and immaculate home. Instead I choose playtimes, fun times, cosy cuddles, day trips, family and friends as really these are the things that fill a life and I’d rather that than fill a vacuum!

Plus as the meme that does the round on social media says – ‘”I totally should have done more cleaning” said no one ever’.

So there you have it. Feel free to judge but a happy home isn’t always a tidy home.